On August 20,2025, I released my second album ever, “The Forgotten.” This record has a lot of raw emotions, with deep meaning and roots. The songs on this record dates back to the day that Chris Cornell of Soundgarden/Audioslave passed away after losing his battle with depression on May 18th, 2017. The song, “A Relative Loss” is dedicated to him.
I continued writing and started to really grow as a musician. I mainly write instrumentals because I am a huge @metallica fan and love their instrumentals, specifically: Call of Ktulu, Orion, To Live Is To Die and Suicide and Redemption. The songs you hear on my album are 100% written, produced, mixed and edited by me. After every recording, I got better at mixing and my songs became more dynamic with many layers.
I only use GarageBand on my iPad to record the songs you hear. I hook up an iRig to my iPad and plug my guitar and bass in and play. GarageBand has a lot of amazing features. All guitars and bass are using their simulators. The drums?? Well if you know, you know…
So, I released my first record called, Devilution, on all streaming services in 2020. I continued writing and began to experiment with vocals. Yes, that is me screaming on “It Comes For You” and “Wolf In Sheep’s Clothes.” Both songs written during a very dark time.
And then…in about late 2022 and 2023, I stopped writing and playing all together. It all started when my cat, Ricky passed away. I was working two jobs, which didn’t leave much time for playing. But then in 2024, I started writing “To Ricky” (An Unfinished Tale). And this is not just a clever name-I literally never finished it because of some issues with my iRig. Once again, I stopped writing and forgot about it.
From 2020 until present, there were always four songs that I continued to listen to, but never released: “It Comes For You” “A Wolf In Sheep’s Clothes” “Life Is Death” and “Pretty.” All four songs have a very deep meaning and message. I listened to these songs for 3 years and did nothing with them, keeping them all to myself. “A Wolf in Sheep’s Clothes” was written about one of my supervisors that sexually harassed me for 2.5 years. I eventually spoke up and that is where my healing and my journey began…
Fast forward to February 10, 2025-My father passed away unexpectedly. Two weeks later, I suffered another traumatic loss. This resulted in me asking for help because the grief was just too heavy. So I joined a group that met a few times per week. I also saw a doctor and a therapist. This required me to open up my dusty ass iPad again that I haven’t touched in years in order to attend groups.
In processing my grief, it made me remember that song I wrote for Ricky and I went back to listen to it. When I opened GarageBand, I noticed five completely finished songs without any names. I listened to each one as if I was listening to a new band. I had completely forgotten about them. Those songs were named: “Neither Living Nor Dead,””Escaped,” “Set the Hook,””Turn of the Tide” and “A House Left Unpainted.” The last referred to my late father who painted houses and hung wallpaper for a living. The others were based on what I was going through in the moment when re-discovering these songs…
I listened to these songs for a few weeks and then I told my doctor how I had completely forgotten about them. He asked me, “Ever thought to use your music with your patients?” I told him that I never even considered it. He said, “You Should.” So I made edits. I have been a therapist for about almost 18 years now where I conduct individual sessions and also run therapy groups. Then one day I was running a group with a handful of patients that were into rock and metal.
Everyone shared a meaningful song with one another, and towards the end of the group there was time left. So, I said, let me play “Set the Hook” for them. They listened intently and lost their minds. They wanted another song!! They were all headbanging, smiling and laughing.
It was at this very moment that I realized that my music can literally change someone’s mood. The patients said they walked into the group sluggish and down but left completely energized. One of those patients said to me, (and this was the critical moment) “Dude, you’re like, really good. Like, you need to do something with your music. This has to become more than just a hobby.”
I sat with this for a week and then I made the decision to put all of these songs together and release them. I spent months remixing. Then, I created a lyric video for “A Wolf In Sheep’s Clothes,” which includes positive affirmations during the intro and guitar solos.”
Then, I said, “F- It,” and emailed @wsoustreetpatrol. I asked them to play “Wolf In Sheep’s Clothes.” I didn’t hear from them for a few weeks and then all of a sudden, they responded to me.
And on July 23, 2025, my song was played on 89.5 WSOU (an independent metal radio stations since the mid-80s). If you are metal-head, you know how influential WSOU has been in opening the door for countless metal giants. The song was played at 9:00pm during a bit called, “Yank or Crank.” Basically, a song is played and people can call in or text to yank the song (don’t like it) or crank it (like it). When they introduced my song, I was freaking out. When the song ended, they announced that the listeners voted to CRANK IT!!
I reached out to them the next day and they said that I recieved ALL cranks. Not one person called to yank the song. This was my confirmation that I needed to keep going.
On July 24, 2025, I went to the Summer of Loud show which featured, Beartooth, Parkway Drive, Killswitch Engage, and I Prevail. I almost didn’t go to the show but my best friend dragged my ass out of the house. My friend and I had different seats and I was sitting by myself because my other friend couldn’t go to the show. I was pretty close to the 100 section.
And this is where it all got weird.
While sitting at the concert, @zenofscreaming starts walking up the steps and sits about 15 feet away from me! As usual, I said, “F It” and said hello to her. We both took a picture together and it was just so cool to meet this famous metal vocal coach. She’s this little tiny lady that works with the best metal singers in the biz. I went back to my seat and then I saw a waitress go up to her and she’s ordering a drink. I noticed that she was having difficulty finding her wallet from her bag. So I did what I usually do, and said, “F It.”
I walked over there and I handed my debit card to the waitress. Melissa Cross looks up at me and was like, “Really??” I’m like, “Yeah, I’m buying your drink.” Prior to walking over to her, I wrote in my notes, “I’m totally not a weirdo or creep, but I have this song that you really need to hear and I’m going to tag you with our picture.” She said to send it and she assured me that I wasn’t a creep. Lol.
I go back to my seat and behind me are four women and they were like, “Who was that?” So I told them about who she was. These four women were really nice to me, they even watched my stack of new concert tshirts that I had purchased at the show. Once again, what did I do? “I said, “F It” and told them about my music. We’ve been friends on IG ever since!
10 minutes later, Killswitch finished and I started walking up the aisle to go to the bathroom. Coming towards me was @robcaggiano, who used to play lead guitar for Anthrax and Volbeat! I am a huge fan of his playing and it has had a strong impact on my music. I stopped him and was like, “Dude, I’m a huge fan, can I get a picture with you? He said,”Yea, nice shirt and tag me” (I was wearing a Slayer Show No Mercy tank top). So we took a picture and I was freaking out…shaking and trembling thinking about these two metal giants that I had just met.
I went home and tagged them all. And they both responded. @zenofscreaming thanked me for the Coca Cola that I had bought her and @robcaggiano also responded. He said that he would listen to “A Wolf In Sheep’s Clothes.” He eventually got back to me and told me he liked the song and also to keep it going!! I couldn’t believe what was happening.
About three weeks earlier, I was working with Pawel and Vlad from @all4bands to design a shirt for the song “A Wolf In Sheep’s Clothes.” It was so cool to watch my vision come to life…
The story behind the design of the shirt was about my old supervisor that sexually harassed me. He was a textbook “wolf in sheep’s clothes” and he wore a huge diamond crucifix around his neck. You can see the cross on the wolf in the design if you look closely.
I messaged @wsoustreetpatrol and told them about my upcoming record and that I’ll be sending them a tshirt in every size to give out to callers! I didn’t hear from them for a week or two but then they finally responded and wanted me to send another song to them. Another two weeks went by and I didn’t hear from them at all.
Then one day, at the end of my work day, they messaged me and told me to send another song to play on the radio! Prior to them messsaging me, I had just said to my coworkers that I reached out to them and hadn’t heard back.
Then, 20 minutes later, they responded and said that they would play the other song and tell listeners that it was release day. I told them that I am a therapist and want my music to help people, and they mentioned that on air! I was so proud because I truly believe in my music and music in general as having healing powers; especially the community and love from metalheads. If you know, you know!
“The Forgotten” was deliberately released on a Wednesday because that’s when @wsoustreetpatrol is on the air-every Wednesday from 8-10pm.
They played the song, “Escaped” and I was so happy!! So happy!!!
Which brings us to now…there are some people that I would like to thank. It is because of these people that I have gotten to this point where my songs are being played on the radio, a lifelong dream of mine.
Mom and Dad: For getting me piano lessons at 6, buying me my first bass, buying tickets to every show I’ve ever played and letting me blast Metallica songs all day so that I could learn how to play them. Thank you, Dad for driving @disputetoflames to play at CBGB in your Suburban!!! That Suburban got us to where we needed to go! Thank you, Dad.
My brother: For letting me attend your first concert when I was 6 years old to watch your band, Blackjack, play at Studio One in Newark. I thank you for introducing me to rock and metal at a young age by taking me to my first concert, which was Metallica in 1997. Thank you for leaving your guitar and bass around. Behind your back, I would put the bass on and pretend to play in the mirror. LOL. I remember you singing “Night Train” and Aerosmith specifically. Thanks for coming to my shows and coming on stage to help me with my gear at all my Starland Shows. Thanks for giving me the lifetime gift of music that has saved my life time and time again.
Grandma: Thank you for buying a ticket for every show that I’ve ever played! You were instrumental in my growth as a musician and a person! You’ve never seen me play live but at your service, Steve and I played, “Wish You Were Here.” I am pretty confident that that was the first time that you’ve seen me play. I love you.
Dave: Thanks for starting guitar lessons with Van Cohen. Soon after I got bass lessons from him and then we started our cover band with Josh. Crazy times dude.
NR: Brother. My goodness. Where would I be if we never met in “Music Appreciation” at BCC? What if I got into a four year school right out of high school? We would have never met. I actually don’t have words for what our relationship means. We both grew as musicians. You introduced me to the Misfits and all of a sudden…we’re opening up for them! Dude, the stories, the blood, sweat and tears…I owe it all to you, brother. I wouldn’t be where I am without you…Remember: we’re Lars and James all the way through…
@anotherdistraction thanks for making me a full time member! I have such great memories with you guys. I love you all!!! Thank you for having confidence in me!!
My sister: For always supporting me and introducing me into the world of counseling. Without you…I would not be where I am at.
JS: Do I really need to say? You were my producer…you helped me grow so much as a person and a musician. You give me courage, brother. I thank you for teaching me how to program my drums better and telling me when something was lame. It was weird about how we met…I love you brother.
My Group: You guys woke me up!! You all were there for me at my darkest. Telling me that my music was good and the encouragement pushed me to reignite this fire that has been out for some time! You all know exactly what I mean. I love you guys.
My coworkers: BB, SK, TS, AB, NR, NF, AG, CC, RR. The ones that supported me as always and promoting my album on release day and buying shirts and encouraging me! I’d also like to thank the ones that didn’t support me. Y’all gave me some material for my next one…”So, please.”
SM: My fellow Elder-Emo! Thank you for all of the support over the years and rocking out in the morning!!! Never stop singing!!!
JE: We go back to 8th Grade…you’ve always been there for me and one of my biggest fans…back to the Dispute to Flames era…and Metallica on Mother’s Day!!!
My cousins: you’ve always supported me! JE: For playing a show in Dispute to Flames with your ska band-Legitimate Business was legendary!!! And seeing you at Starland with your trombone losing your mind?!?! I was so proud of you at that moment.
EP: I’ve known you since I was 8 years old, man. You took me to Metallica with my brother in 97. I remember listening to Use Your Illusions while waiting in line in your hot car to get inspected. So many memories…you gave me the ultimate gift of music. Without you, would not be where I am.
My Aunt: For letting DTF: a crazy bunch of Jersey boys turning your sun room and turning it into a studio! And the fireworks?? Wow! Great times!!!
Ricky, Kalypso, Odie, Neeka: Thank you. You’ve heard and seen it all!!! Kalypso: thanks for sleeping in my guitar case while I wrote and recorded.
@wsoustreetpatrol for responding to me and taking a chance on a one man band!!! I owe you guys!!!
And last but not least…
I would like to thank THE “Wolf in Sheep’s Clothes” for giving me the strength and courage to write a song that could really help people. WE WIN!!!! AND WE WILL RISE!!!
The Devilution Project 